


eridan verses his totally not dumb quirk

by smolskyfri



Category: Homestuck
Genre: M/M, also minor erikat, i dont know if im doing this right, minor davekat, really short, shitpost
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-06
Updated: 2018-04-06
Packaged: 2019-04-19 00:50:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 589
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14225517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smolskyfri/pseuds/smolskyfri
Summary: Eridan thinks his voice sounds dumb on this weird recording device.He tries repeating what he said, but...





	eridan verses his totally not dumb quirk

**Author's Note:**

> im really sorry its dumb but i think its funny and i have no idea what to write
> 
> my sister and i made this on a whim
> 
> she didnt really help she just wanted to read it

"wwater is cool"

You sound super fuckin dumb with this recording device. You click the record and try again, mimicking what you just said. You press the play button and hear:

"wwwwater is cool"

Holy shit, it just got stupider. Try again, dumbass.

"wwwwwwwwater is cool"

Oh god, the tragedy.

"wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwater is cool"

You need to get this right before someone walks in on you making a fool of yourself. You take a deep breath and try again.

"wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwater is cool"

Holy _shit_ is this _fuckin **dumb**!_

You decide that you will _never, NEVER_ use this _stupid **fuckin** **device**_ any longer.

You proceed to chuck it against the wall, smashing into a million pieces. Good riddance.

**FUCK AAAUGH**

It's broken, and it won't stop repeating "wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwater" very loudly no matter _how_ _long_ you mess with it, so you sprint out of the room, muttering "wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwater" under your breath.

 

* * *

 

Karkat, trying to watch a shitty romcom with his dumbass alien boyfriend unfortunately hears the loud crash of the recorder smashing against the wall and shares a worried glance with Dave.

He hurriedly makes his way over to the room he heard the noise come from, and is speechless to hear Eridan's voice saying "wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwa-wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww-wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwater" from the rubble on the ground, but he's only quiet for a short moment before he bursts out laughing. Dave hurries into the room, and is super confused about Karkat's behavior until he hears the recording. He smirks, stifles a laugh, and joins Karkat on the ground, doing exactly what the "ROFL" acronym was created for.

 

* * *

 

The next day after the shitty recording device incident, you find a gift-wrapped box wrapped in drawings that look like they belong to Terezi. Examining it, you see the only thing written on the box is  to eridan , there's not even a "from me" (or whatever) on it.

You unwrap it, and find a cassette looking thingy. You don't have a walkman or anything, so you just poke and gnaw at it until you break it. Nice going, asshat.

You groan in frustration having broken the device, and glare down at the cassette thingy and you see... a USB sitting comfortably in some sort of spongey packaging thing.

What the hell, did the mysterious sender know you would try to eat it or something??

Any-fuckin-way, you plug the USB into your husktop, and discover there are only two files on it, even though the USB is one of those expensive ones with a lot of space. You open the text file first, because that's what normal people do, and find the file only contains the words of  listen to the mp3 file first, fishdick 

Wow. Rude.

You scroll down on the text document and find that there are more words, them being  speak for yourself 

You growl at the screen in confusion and frustration. Begrudgingly, you double-click on the mp3 file, and...

Oh no.

Why do you have to exist?

 

* * *

 

Little does Eridan know, Dave Strider is snickering, peeking out of the room's door, filming Eridan silently cry as he listens to Dave's remix of the broken recorder sputtering out "wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwater", with occasional (and original) raps (and extra feels to spice it up a little, don't forget that).

Unbeknownst to Dave, Karkat also happens to be there, watching the whole thing. At the moment, he's conflicted. He's deciding whether or not he should use his moirail-y powers to comfort Eridan and his embarrassment, kick Dave's butt, or laugh along with him because Eridan  _has_ kind of been a jerk recently.

**Author's Note:**

> if someone actually makes a remix of eridan saying "wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwater", i will cry
> 
> anyway thanks for reading this was a dumb thing i made on a whim


End file.
